Wednesday, January 25, 2012
Posted by Mandy at 6:50 PM
Monday, January 16, 2012
- "Excuse the mess, we are making memories here!" I want to finally put a sincere effort into remembering what is the most important job and priority of being a mother is. I so easily get frustrated with my children just because they are being kids and my house isn't the way I feel it should be. I am grateful for people in my life that remind me of this principle.. I have one friend that just had a baby and I was over at her house and her kids were running wild and she just smiled and said, "I just try to remember that it won't always be this way and this is why we are here is to be mom's and I just want to have happy children." Really inspired me. Just to help remind me, I got a pendent made with a little child's hand in the middle and the saying, "making memories."
- Boundaries. Reapplying the boundaries I have made in the past that have made my relationships stronger and not so easily forgetting how black and white they should be. My emotional health is just as important to me or more than anything else! If I am not in a good place emotionally, it's hard to function in life.
- 10k. This past year I have fulfilled things in my life I never saw myself doing. It wasn't planned nor thought about it as I rang in 2011 however by the end of this year, I was able to add things to the list I made. I never have considered myself a runner but I pushed hard and did my best to find the positive side of running and pushing through. I ran my 1st 5k on Thanksgiving Day and I felt like I did great. So for this year I am preparing mentally and physically for my 1st 10k. Not sure when it will happen but it will happen before the years end.
- Read. Prioritize my life so that reading can happen and it can help balance my life a little bit! I'm always happier when I have a book to dive into.
- Eat to live. My dad has always told me to only eat to live, not live to eat. Not sure why he felt that was important until now. I think it is important way of thinking. Our bodies need fuel to have the energy we need to get through our very busy hectic crazy lives and in order to do that, we must feed ourselves with the right kind of food. So I hope to not only do this for myself, but secretly implement this into my children's lives as well. We are what we eat and I have learned that the very hard way.
- Gratitude. 2011 I caught myself being more gracious than previous years but I want to continue on with this and watch how it changes my life and the people around me.
- Learn to love me for me. Cheesy and cliche as that sounds, it's true. I've lived too many years in darkness because I never was happy looking in the mirror for all sorts of reasons. It's not worth living that way just because I never will live up to my own expectations. It will never be enough and that isn't okay anymore. I need to look at the many advantages I do have and the beautiful qualities that make me, me.
- Surround myself with people that bring out the positive in myself. I've wasted many years trying to make everyone like me just to learn that they weren't even true friends and I didn't even enjoy being around them. So this year is to true friends, as few as they may be I know they are true.
- Laugh. Laugh through trials, heartaches, and pain. Laughing has cured my soul and I don't want to lose my sense of humor! It's one of the only drugs left I CAN take.
- Learn something new about my kids every single day and notate the cute, smart, funny things they say so I can always look back and remember the details of their lives.
- Any item in my house must have a home. This basically equals to not stop the battle in organization. An organized house makes a happy mama. ** As long as it doesn't come in the way of resolution #1**
- Everyone is fighting battle. Continue to not forget that we all have our own trials in life and I have no room for judgement. Treat everyone I meet nicely and think of their feelings more than my own selfishness.
- Service. I have an amazing support group in many areas of my life. After all the time they have spent with me by either laughing, crying, advising, helping, listening, funding, or merely just loving me, I want to give back. I am a true believer in karma and it is important to me that I can learn to help others in ways special people have helped me.
Posted by Mandy at 9:22 PM
Friday, January 13, 2012
You came at me with a shot gun to the head. It was not a good start of a year, that's for sure. Luckily it was all up hill from there. I learned some hard lessons and because of great friends, family, and support system, I was able to heal with almost every negative feeling that came to visit. I had many moments where I looked outside of my normal perspective and saw what a beautiful life I have and I embraced every single moment. After so many years of so many low lows, I fought the norm and to choose to start looking at the brighter part of my life. Thank you 2011! Now on the other hand you really hit me with a curve ball when my very well respected and loving grandpa left this earth. He was the complete back bone of our family. It really shook up my family and it's been hard to watch my mom in pain, but I know it was his time and I'm glad he isn't in his day to day physical pain any longer. We love and miss so many things about you Gramps...:)
Because life comes so quick and we don't slow it down and appreciate the small things in our lives, I want to share some of my very own accomplishments that happened in the year of 2011.
Came out of my shell and pushed myself to meet new people in the area and really show them the real vulnerable Mandy. Talk about an accomplishment!
Watched my beautiful baby girl turn 3 years old and go off to preschool for the first time, along with going and leaving me in the nursery class to be a big Sunbeam.
Watched my first born become an actual little man. He has gone from white belt to a proud purple belt (not an easy task). He didn't just start up school, but he started going school FULL time. Talk about mixed emotions. Letting your baby leave you for most of the day and just hope they are okay. Lots of tears and holding onto my leg for the first few months but eventually started going with his head held high. Now he is in the "older" Primary classes and even teaching me parts of the gospel I had not learned yet! I've been able to watch him learn a new language this year which was awesome and completely unexpected. And right before 2011 came to an end, he turned the big 7!
My two babies asked me if they could bare their testimonies in Sacrament Meeting. Shocked because neither Jake or I have done this (not proud) in front of them. But I watched my shy little 3 year old baby get up and talk to the whole congregation on what she knows to be true. Then to listen to my son get up and say so many beautiful things coming from his heart on what he felt about what he learns in primary. That was a proud moment!
Received a calling at my church as a nursery leader. I wasn't sure about this at first but as time went on I felt like I was right where I needed to be to spend most of time in church. It feels so good to watch these children that don't know you at all and slowly over time they love you and want you to either hold them, protect them, teach them, read to them, etc.. I take my lessons seriously and feel proud of myself for accepting the calling.
Not only became a first time pet owner, but a pretty good darn one. We started out with a learning experience by getting my very 1st pet named Cupcake. If you follow my blog or my life in anyway you probably knew about Cupcake. She was a new kitty we bought merely in fear of the mice taking over our home. So let's just say that didn't' work out and I completely realized I am not a cat person. Truthfully I have never been a "animal" person in general! So when I told Jake I wanted a dog he laughed. Eventually we bought Nacho as a tiny baby puppy. I was so in love with him. It's been a hard year with teaching him the basics with what is okay and what is not okay and the potty training, chewing on very expensive things but eventually I became a great dog owner and trainer. He now rings the bell anytime he wants to go outside to play or go potty, SCORE! And not only does he shake, he also sits, lays, plays dead, roll over, and dances. Jake calls me the "dog whisperer."
Went on lots of alone date nights with the hubs oh and lots of group dates..and found everyone of them to be a hard earned and well worth it. Yeah for stronger marriages.
Forrest Gump. Okay Okay I didn't run across the whole country but I sure started running a little here and there and started to actually kinda like it. I never gave myself a chance to even try to run. I always hated it. Told everyone including myself I wasn't made for running and never thought it would change. Somehow someway I got myself to accomplish a darn small 5k Turkey Trot but hey it was a organized run I actually trained for! Ending 2010, I would have put money down that I would never run ANY k in my life. SO BOOM! Huge achievement! (and didn't stop running the whole way on race day.. go me).
I did it, actually did it.. doing makeup. It's always been a fantasy of mine to actually do makeup for people and actually make money off of it. It's not always easy to push your own newly shown work and hope people like it. Granted it's not what celebrity makeup artists are making but dang it, I am doing it and cashing in. And the best part is I actually like my work when I see it in photos! So take that all previous years of not believing in myself to do it! I was lucky enough to work with the best photographers around along with beautiful ladies of all ages including Miss Utah contestants to teenage performing arts group auditioning for Nickelodeon. I was also asked to teach my makeup knowledge with all contestants in a local pageant. I can't wait to see what the future holds in this area of my life.
Did more service than I did the years previous. I searched out a foundation I found very personal to me and contacted the woman who created it. I was able to spend time working with beautiful young ladies in finding the special girl they were and what unique qualities they had. I left and felt honored to be able to sacrifice my time from my own daily duties and get out of my comfort zone and teach what I only wish I knew at their ages!
Brought back an old dusty but mastered skill and started choreographing dance pieces for different production numbers such as Miss Davis County pageant. Also performed a dance routine with an old group of overall queen's for an event. Let me tel you, that was not easy. I was the oldest there and was one of the only mom's that participated. Talk about a challenge!
Graduating from a support group I had for over 3 years. Hard work but worth every minute and dime I spent being there for the best 3.5 years of my life. I met amazing people and learned unforgettable tools to live a healthy and a happy life. And the best part was that I was the one doing it for me.. to be a better Mandy, mommy, wife, daughter, and sister.
Celebrated my 8th year of marriage with my hard working babies daddy :) wink wink. Another year I can say we made it!! It hasn't always been a walk in the park but grateful we are still going strong after so many bumps on the sidewalk.
And luckily we were able to take a few different vacations this year down to good ol Sin City, Las Vegas. We lived it up down there for two different occasions.
2011 has been good to me, what can I say? I'm proud of myself and the extra work I did to be able to check many things off my bucket-list and to honestly say with certainty that I spent the past 365 days living and learning!
Thank you for all the positive things that have come to pass this year. I will hold them in my memories along within my beloved blog. I have learned a lot from you. Now onto new 2012 where the possibilities are endless and hope to love more, laugh harder, and possibly work on a new addition to the Martin family at some point in the year... eeek! HANG ON, it's going to get bumpy:)
Posted by Mandy at 4:07 PM
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
You know what is so sad? I couldn't wear these IF I wanted to! I always knew one day somehow someway my disability would be shown in one way or another! Darn "Running Barefoot" shoes. Thanks a bunch! ;) Wait, maybe just maybe if Dr Phil or Dr Oz get a hold of this post they will find a way to personalize a pair designed specifically only for my very "special" webbed toes.
Side note: Can you imagine how silly they would look?? hehehe. You have my permission to laugh just this once about me.. only once.
p.s. My poor poor children-. Who knows what 2020 will bring when it comes to new inventions that have to show off their beautiful (handed down from their mommy) webbed toes. Good luck Buz & Londs. Remember Mommy always told you that "different is special." lol.
Posted by Mandy at 2:23 PM